Well-Dressed Skeleton in the Closet Needs a New Home

One of the great benefits of writing a blog no one knows about (ergo, no one reads) is that it's perfectly acceptable to take a little time off. In this case, quite a bit of time off, but as I predicted, I did not receive any letters of sadness or scorn, so I feel confident that it's just me and the crickets here. And this is absolutely the only place where that is true.

Amber sent my digital camera back to me after I had left it in Richmond at her one-year-old daughter's (Addison) party. I was sorting through drawers and closets, not entirely ready to delve into the commitment of packing (I also received my new lease today), and I came upon something in my closet I should have exorcised years ago. And I wish I were being metaphorical. Let's assess the situation: I am in a fabulously exciting and serious 9-month relationship that will result in blissfully ever after. What would be the most appropriate thing for one to do, in my position? Exactly. Sell the unused wedding dress in the closet. So I hung the dress on the bathroom door and took pictures with little contrast to speak of. [Also, and this just begs to be said-- the dress is gorgeous. I had forgotten how stunning it was. It's tiny; I don't know anyone who would be able to fit into it, including myself, but it's just beautiful. I would buy it. You know, if some part in the back of my mind didn't believe it was cursed. And if it weren't already mine.] With not a little residual humiliation, I managed to write the ad header, "Gorgeous, Brand New Size 2 Wedding Gown, Never Been Worn" without any self-loathing, lingering doubts or attempts to defenestrate myself. (You have no idea how long I've been waiting to use that word in a situation that didn't seem forced. What an accomplishment.)

So I posted my ad and almost immediately got a scamming reply and another denying all scamming, although the format and verbiage might as well be lifted right from the warnings on craigslist. A note to aspiring scammers: Be aware of what others are saying about you, because really, episodes like this are not only unsuccessful, but rather embarrassing. I actually feel for this person who is trying to scam me. Also because she's a deplorable speller, but that's an entirely different thing.

The boy is in the Dominican Republic and is it a little bit forgivable that I felt better when I read that it would thunderstorm there? He keeps calling several times a day, usually for only 2-4 minutes at a time. This morning at 4 it was to say that he loves me and misses me and wants me to be involved in everything. But I think that call was a bit lubricated. Today we bumped the time allowance up to 8 minutes or so. I asked if it stormed last night and he asked if I had checked the weather. "Aww," he said, "You looove me!" And it's not that I believe in the old adage, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," quite the opposite, really, I think it makes the heart forgetful or delusional at best. But in this case, I think it's making me realize that I'm in it even more than I have admitted so far. I have been surprised by my feeling on it. But then I have overheated, overpriced flashbacks of the rum-soaked Bahamas where even the chicken tasted like rum, and I can balance it all out a bit.

Okay, so this has actually been fun and, since I write multiple e-mails about all the same things daily anyway, blogging it is.